The pleasure of reading Windies domestic scorecards

 Neil Man­thorp — 06/03/2001

For as long as I can remem­ber I have enjoyed read­ing West Indi­an domes­tic score­cards for the sheer plea­sure of the names. I always won­dered where they came from, and why.

The first West Indi­an crick­eter I came to know well was Glad­stone Small who shrugged his shoul­ders (mak­ing his already small neck dis­ap­pear com­plete­ly) and told me that his par­ents enjoyed the name Glad­stone so, why not call their son that?

There was a very amus­ing joke doing the rounds a cou­ple of years ago that sug­gest­ed the Unit­ed Nations were plan­ning an emer­gency air­lift of vow­els to the Balka­ns where many of the pop­u­la­tion were in such des­per­ate need of them that they were wan­der­ing the streets with such sur­names as Krvtc and Blcrvc. The cities were much bet­ter off either, appar­ent­ly, with Krbc being a prime exam­ple of a city in need.

In the Caribbean the short­age is of sur­names, and the Bus­ta XI rep­re­sent a team in cri­sis. Sylvester Joseph, Mervyn Dil­lon, Sulie­man Benn, Ricky Christo­pher, Ker­ry Jere­my and even Sher­win Camp­bell, to stretch a point, all need help.

The Caribbean is full of the most colour­ful names in the world. How about Toni­to Wil­lett? When asked for the his­to­ry of the name I was told “his­to­ry is what you make it, but it’s hap­pen­ing, eh?”

It’s just one more phrase to add to the 793 I have so far col­lect­ed that I don’t under­stand. It would be more but I’m still strug­gling with the dialect so I haven’t been able to under­stand whether I could under­stand them or not.

Guyana is a mag­nif­i­cent place. Not touristy at all, and cer­tain­ly not clean and tidy, it is, nonethe­less, VERY much itself. There is no mess­ing with Guyana’s iden­ti­ty because every­one here has one, even the low­est nobody scrap­ing a liv­ing from the rub­bish washed up on the beach.

More of that later…

Final­ly, back to the names. The 12th man for the Bus­ta XI was none oth­er than Dave Mohammed. Yes, that’s “Dave” fol­lowed by “Mohammed”. Try as we might, we could­n’t fig­ure that one out. Team man­ag­er Goolam Rajah could­n’t help either, repeat­ing the name three times to him­self before wan­der­ing off in a chuck­ling daze. Imag­ine the South Africa equiv­a­lent. Frikkie Tsha­bal­ala? Mdin­gi van der Mer­we? Charles Naidoo?

Dave Mohammed. You’ve got to love that…

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